Archive for February, 2017

The Silent Fundamentalist


She looked quite close to what this beautiful woman looks like, My youngest aunt. Her name was ‘Sharmistha’ the namesake of one of the 28 Nakshatras (sectors along the ecliptic as per the Hindu astrological literature). I am sorry, I don’t have any photograph of hers with me at the moment. But her memories are still vivid in my mind. Only memories. She is not here anymore. She is gone. She succumbed to a congenital birth defect in her heart (Ventricular Septal Defect) when she was just above 30 and that was almost 13 years ago. She died a virgin. She knew she could have never married. She was born to fight. She fought death with unparalleled courage. She had been with me for the first 20 years of my life since my infancy. She’d taught me to speak. She’d taught me to walk. She’d taught me to read, write and learn. She was my friend, philosopher and guide. She had shown me how to fight ghosts. She had shown me how to fight pain. She had taught me how to fight fear. She had taught me how to teach others by setting examples. Alas ! She died fighting Death. There was nothing that could have been done. Her body could have never supported any surgery. But I was with her when she died. I still remember her last breath. I still remember the blood that spurted out of her nose and mouth at the moment of her departure to oblivion. I remember her screams. I remember how eventually she desperately requested us to kill her to save her the pain.

It all happened in front of me. I was watching everything. When the doctor declared her dead, I ran outside of the ICU to the hospital ground. There was a tree beneath which I took refuge in isolation. I wanted to cry. But I was stunned. I was trying to grasp what had just happened. Eventually I began to cry in silence. Inconsolably. There was a sudden thunder burst and heavy wind for about 3 minutes that came out of nowhere.

Oh, yes, God had sent that to help me cry well in disguise. God, said that she was a good person and her time was up. She had to go. And you know what I said God in reply?

“Fuck Off”.

And that was the day I killed God inside my mind and began my long travel towards the Truth without a hypocritical God. I stopped talking out loud. I began to think to fight the dark cloud. The cloud of Death. The could that frightens little narrow minds and lets the wicked reign. And I embraced the fundamentals. Science. The laws of Nature. In Silence.


The Central Philosophy


The significance of Ψ and ∞

To make it easy to follow what I mean, here are some artistically scientific visual descriptions of the symbols. Please note that the symbols are just that, symbols.



This (above) is what I mean by Ψ


This (above) is what I mean by


As far back as my mind can retrace its reverse chronological phases, I remember being restless in trying to resolve the paradox of my own existence. I have followed religions, philosophies, stories, myths, cults and cultures. Nowhere did I find any solace. On one hand I had to work for the sustenance of my own existence without even knowing what or why it is and on the other hand I had this depressing feeling of not knowing something that I am so keenly attached to. Thus I have spent, almost all of my life, so far, trying to understand who, what and why I am. I do not have all the answers. Yet, I have not been biased for any emotional gratification that ignores the scientific Truth. I have not taken the side I was born into, neither have I taken any other side.

Then I stumbled upon something impressive; Physics, which (as per its Greek origin) means: The Knowledge of Nature. I got used to Physics from a time very early in my school days. I used to be fascinated by the unfailing ways of predictions shown by it. I was getting increasingly amazed by Physics mainly because of its power of prediction, albeit, its domain was limited to Intelligence.

My problem was not my intelligence. It was my emotions. The most traumatic thing was, not even I was able to understand and predict my emotional response to my surroundings. I did ask my teachers, spiritual leaders and so called Gurus, even some professors I personally knew. I used to: read a lot, watch a lot and learn a lot. Everywhere I heard the echo of one sentiment:


I accepted that echo and went into depression because except Science, I could not trust anything else. Not even God; The God who I used to believe.

The Story:

NATURE vs nature:

As they say: “ Every cloud has a silver lining.”, at the peak of my depression, I found my missing piece. The Mind.

It is during my own study of Psychology, I realized what I was missing. I never considered the effect of Nature on my mind or the effect of my own mental fluctuations on the way I used to feel Nature.

Ever heard the statement or anything similar to: “Sometimes all you need to change is your very own perspective.”? I have encountered it very often and have now understood what it means.

I don’t think it is correct to say that Science cannot serve as a guide to moral or emotional standards. It can very well be that. We have simply not been able to apply Science to a domain beyond the present limitations of our collective intelligence (including AI). Rather, I say, Science is the best framework of all the structures of human knowledge for setting moral and emotional standards, even at the cost of gradual abolishment of the current ones that are non-scientific.

I believe, there is the inner nature, Ψ, that signifies one’s mind (origin of meta-physical experiences felt by the one), that is associated to the physical nature, ∞, which signifies everything else (including one’s own body). Science, thus far, has been studying the physical existence of Nature and it has been, at least in my opinion, making progress very much commendably.

What I am more interested in (apart from the path-breaking discoveries and research attempts in String Theory, Quantum Physics, Cosmology or any other area of Theoretical Physics) is The Theory of Everything, for which, many more unexpected factors vis-à-vis Cognitive Science, NeuroScience and Psychology or even Arts seem not only beneficial but also essential and inevitable.


Thus is this attempt of mine, to live upto my personal meaning of life, led by my inability to stall my curiosity that serves as a bridge between my emotion and my intelligence, letting my feelings to break free from the melodrama of the moronic social perceptions and rules, to live and die doing Science and Knowing Nature.

What remains to be seen is, how the interplay of Ψ and ∞ is revealed…

To Infinity and Beyond.

—————(Ψ )—————


802665Poor sleep is common at high altitude. Most trekkers don’t sleep well at a higher altitude. Trekkers commonly report intense dreams, feeling of being suffocated and wake up feeling unrefreshed.

Trekkers arriving at higher altitude commonly experience poor quality sleep. Sleep at a higher altitude can become fitful and difficult. High altitude can have many effects on the body. Oxygen which is at 20.8% (approx.) at sea level dwindles to 13% at an altitude of 3,600 meters. The lack of oxygen causes the preliminary disturbance in the sleep pattern. It causes rapid breathing to maintain proper oxygen flow. The rapid intake of oxygen also causes a faster rate of Carbon dioxide release. The carbon dioxide sensors in the body try to control the rapid release by slowing the rate of exhaling of CO2. Due to these adjustments in fast and slow breathing, a trekker experiences a disturbed sleep pattern (Sleep Apnea).

We take…

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React || Believe || Respond

A Very Interesting Read. Thanks to the Girl with the Flaws.

The Girl With The Flaws

When I was a teenager, I hated a lot of things about my life. I thought I didn’t belong. That’s pretty normal. What is weird is I still feel like I don’t belong. Not in a crowd but with the people I have known for years. Did I ever grow up? Or is it that we never do? Or maybe none of this is about maturity, it is about emotions. And emotions never age.

I have struggled with feeling like an outsider from time to time. For a long time I thought that moving somewhere different and drastically changing my life was the only way I was ever going to be happy. To be honest, a part of me still feels that way. But slowly I am realizing that I can create the life I want for myself no matter where I live or what I do. Right here, right…

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The Violinist

Let the hummings begin
Let the bow run back and forth
Let the strings of steel dance in trance
For I am the only one of its kind…
Thus is my violin And I let her speak my mind…
Enough said already,
Have had enough wasted words..
Now is the time To become God
Or The destroyer of worlds…

The Dark Disdains


When the animals are done

Scavenging, hunting, fighting and gathering,

The true colours begin to bleed

As it gets darker and darker.

When the man returns,

His wife blushes red,

In anticipation of what is

About to come,

When the food is served,

But the hunger demands something else,

The veils of hypocrisy give way,

Revealing the true skins,

When the two brewing souls

Embrace, Hold, Soothe and slumber,

Penetrate each other in melancholy,

Indifferences vanish.

When the city sleeps,

A poet awakes,

seduced by the bare innocence Of Nature,

A man finds his true self.

When the sun dies out,

The moon begins to fade,

Facades of righteousness begin to shatter

With the dark disdains all around.

I may be wrong.

I may be right.

Great many things happen every day

But better things happen only at night.

Leadership: A Short Note

Let’s accept it. We are now living in a world that has recently trashed the monarchies and increasingly moving on the path of liberty and equal rights. There, however, still seems to be a nostalgic feeling when it comes to bearing the torch; how should our leaders behave?

More importantly, how should we choose our leaders? Do they have to be dramatic in their behaviours, the ones that stun us with their statements and attires, or do they have to be better than the rest of the team? Do they, really?

In that sentiment we seem to have been confused in our approach to choose a leader. We still cling on to the melodramatic imagery where a lion claims the throne and rules the rest. And in there, lies our blunder. Gone are the kings and queens on the hands of which relied the fate of the mass without an alternative. It is a democratic governance and we are all humans of equal rights, albeit, different skills, interests and abilities. That’s why when we think of choosing a leader, we mustn’t cite instances of those fictitious lions or tigers. Rather, we must behave like the wolves. And wolves respect the pack, above the leader.

In terms of simplicity, we can take an effective and smart network of computers led by a server machine. The server machine does not have to be super computer or necessarily better than the client computers. It can be just one of them with the ability to fulfil its workload efficiently.

In any ideal team of humans, every member shares the credit, loss and responsibility equally. The team needs a leader as a mediator among many only to prevent confusion and bring about a unified route to success with the consensus of the majority while ensuring that the minority as well as the anarchists get what they deserve. The leader is in no way, a king that reigns over the people.